My mom told me when I was younger (before I was married) that once a person gets married, they find out how selfish they really are. I guess I kind of blew it off since I wasn't even dating anyone at the time, and I really didn't think that this advice would pertain to me. Boy, was I wrong. It took getting married and then having children to find out how incredibly selfish and whiny I can be.
Since I've gotten married nearly 8 years ago, I have found that my mom was right. I mean, sometimes I could easily be mistaken for a three-year-old who isn't getting their way. I would complain about everything (whether big or small) and most of the time, I think I didn't even realize that I was doing it.
One of the big things that I've found to complain about where we live. I've had it in my head for the past 3 years (and flowing out of my mouth) that I want to either live closer to our church (which is 1 hour away) so that we can be more involved than we are, or I want to live no more than half hour from my parents (which are 24 hours away). Those were the only two options that I'd fixed my mind on and the only two options that God was given. He needed to let us know which one it was going to be and when. I also wanted to fix up our enormous "fixer-upper" so that we can sell it and get to one of the above two destinations (quickly). My mind was made up. I'd pray about it so that I could hear what the plans were.
Somewhere along the line though, the Lord must have re-wired my "whine-ware" so that I would notice when I was complaining. I really began to notice it a lot. Our pastor even ended a message with "Please do not complain about where you are. The Israelites complained and it took them 40 years to get through the wilderness. Had they not complained, it would have only taken them about a week."
That was it!! I decided that I would not complain about living in this city. Then, I wouldn't have to be here 40 years!! I really felt good about my decision.
Well, recently I was able to connect with someone and the Lord gave me a new revelation through this conversation: I am perfectly happy being here, in this city. I want to reach out and love the people from this community and see souls saved and see Christians be able to mature in their faith. No matter how long it takes, no matter if we have to drive 1 hour to church each week several times for years, and whether or not I have to wait to see my family only once every year or so, I want to be here. Doing God's will. I know now what it feels like to be content where He's called me to be. And, I still want to get my house fixed up, but now for a different reason: I want to enjoy it while we're here.
Thank you Lord for showing me my selfishness and even more for what you're doing in my heart. Help me to be a witness wherever I go, and wherever I live.
Proverbs 21:19
It’s better to live alone in the desert than with a quarrelsome, complaining wife.
Texas wedding
10 years ago
3 comments:
Good post! Did you talk to Scott recently and did he pay you to write this? :) just kidding. I know exactly what you are talking about.
:) Happy for you!! Let me know if you need help painting. ;)
This was very encouraging to me. I went to school with Chris and I am very happy to know he and his family is serving the Lord. We live in Myerstown and I would love to live outside of town with some land. I have 4 boys and they are ranging from 14 down to 2 we think living out of town with some land we could enjoy it outside more with them (we have a dune buggy and 4wheelers). And I am constantly talking about when we have this house finished we need to get out of town. Well It has been about 10 years we have been talking about it and I am going to turn the tables around and be content where I am. I am truly thankful that the Lord has allowed us to own a home and have the luxuries that we do and when He has the home for us then I will be patient and waite. Keep serving the Lord.
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